It's Never Too Late To Apologize

We learned of a heartwarming story that occurred in one our our residential homes this past week. One of the home’s residents had recently experienced an angry outburst that a neighbor witnessed in the front yard. Unfortunately, the neighbor’s presence meant that she received a few not-so-nice insults from the youngster, who directed her frustrations at the the neighbor. Incidentally, this particular neighbor had issued several complaints over the years. We acknowledge that living near a houseful of teenagers, many of which have behavioral challenges that sometimes result in shouting and other disturbances, is not, perhaps, the most ideal neighbor situation!

After a supportive discussion with the house counselors, the youth in question, went to the neighbors home, knocked on her door, and issued a heartfelt apology. What happened next was truly incredible!

The day after the apology was given, the neighbor came over with laden with gifts and supplies for the kids and home! We were absolutely in awe of the generosity and community spirit demonstrated by the neighbor. This was an incredible positive moment for the youth, who learned the true power of owning up to a mistake and making an appropriate repair to the relationship, by apologizing.

The neighbor continues to stop by with donations of food and other supplies. While the youth’s apology was critical in opening up this relationship, we also understand, that by providing a ‘why’ to explain the disruptive behaviors of some of our youth, is also incredibly beneficial.

At least 90% of our youth have been exposed to, or have experienced situations that leave them hurt, confused, angry, and traumatized. Traumatic experiences disrupt the normal timeline for brain development, and also make it easy for someone impacted by trauma, to be triggered into a reaction, that might be confusing or frightening for others to experience. Some reactions to trauma might be an outburst, like the youth in this story, others turn inwards, experiencing, depression, anxiety, or act out by abusing substances, and making risky choices.

This is why Youth Homes exists. We believe that ALL youth, deserve a chance to heal from trauma, and be given an opportunity to learn the skills that will help them thrive, not just survive, life’s challenges. Which is why we celebrate even small successful moments like this one.